Embracing Midlife Solitude and Sacred Silence

There is a specific kind of silence that arrives in midlife. When my kids were little, my house was a symphony of slamming doors, buzzing timers, and the constant “Mom?” or “Hey, do you know where…?”

But now it’s just me, not in a house anymore, but in an apartment. The pace has slowed, and for many, that can feel jarring. It’s easy to look at an empty afternoon or a quiet living room and mistake that space for loneliness. However, I’ve discovered something beautiful in this season: a profound difference between loneliness and sacred silence.

Loneliness vs. Solitude

Loneliness is a feeling of lack—the painful sense that something is missing. Sacred silence, or solitude, is a state of being full.

I have come to truly love the solitude. It isn’t a vacuum to be feared; it’s a container for God’s presence. In our younger years, we often view silence as “dead air” that needs to be filled with a podcast, the television, or a quick scroll through social media. We’ve been conditioned to believe that if we aren’t consuming noise, we aren’t “doing” anything.

But in this midlife transition, I am learning that the quiet is where the most important work happens.

You are Never Truly Alone

The foundation of my love for solitude is a simple, theological truth: God is omnipresent. When the kids leave the house or the social calendar thins out, I am never actually “alone” in the sense of being isolated.

Because God is everywhere, He is in the very air of my quiet kitchen. He is in the stillness of the early morning.

“Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?”

— Psalm 139:7

When we realize that God is beside us, the silence no longer feels empty. It starts to feel like a conversation we finally have time to hear.

Resisting the Urge to “Fill” the Space

The greatest challenge of this season is resisting the reflex to fill the quiet with “noise.” Noise is a numbing agent; it keeps us from facing our thoughts or hearing the “still, small voice.”

When we intentionally keep the space open, we create room for:

• Deep Reflection: Asking the hard questions about our purpose and our next chapter.
• Creative Flourishing: Many of us have dormant dreams—writing, painting, gardening, or building—that require a quiet mind to finally bloom.
• True Prayer: Moving beyond “grocery list” prayers into a space of simply sitting with the Creator.

How to Embrace the Sacred Silence

If you find yourself struggling with the quiet of midlife, try these shifts in perspective:

• Audit Your “Noise”: For one hour a day, intentionally turn off the background music or the news, and no scrooling. See what thoughts rise to the surface. Basically, unplug for 1 hour a day.
• Reframe the House: Instead of seeing an empty nest. room or a quiet office as a sign of what’s gone, see it as a “sanctuary” prepared specifically for your rest.
• Create Something: Use the mental bandwidth you used to spend on logistics to create something new ( cooking, baking, crafting, writing, journaling, photography). God is a Creator, and we reflect His image when we use our solitude to make something beautiful.

Final Thoughts

Midlife allows us a luxury we didn’t have a decade ago: the gift of presence. We no longer have to rush. We can sit. We can breathe. And we can realize that in the middle of the “quiet,” we are more looked after, more seen, and more “companied” than we ever imagined.

Don’t fear the silence. It is the canvas upon which God wants to paint the next version of your life. I’m not alone, even when I’m alone.

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